A couple of months ago I wrote a post about how I’ve got nothin’.
To write, that is.
I know you all know that I had a catastrophic momma loss this year and have literally been one-step-at-a-timing through the days. I’ve gotta tell ya, this first Christmas season without her is rough.
I’m going to try something new: write a poem right this second and see if any words accumulate on the page. If not, this goes to Drafts. If so, we’ll see what it says.
Her Holiday by Jessica 12/18/22
‘Saturdays tick by
the calendar pages flipping so quickly that my eyes can barely keep up.
I saw her in March
it’s now December.
The wind blows days around like glittered snow in the afternoon sun, beautiful but fleeting.
Christmas approaches without her
missing her like crazy.
She LOVED Christmas
had boxes of decorations, a brilliant tree, lights on outside things.
She adored Christmas shopping
the hand picking out of gifts for those she loved
even when a walker had to accompany her to the stores
nothing stood in her way at Christmas.
is all that stands between
me and my first Christmas without her.
Ouch how that hurts.
I told her we’d miss her every day
I was correct
I find myself asking ‘who will read such a thing?’
I mean, sadness at Christmas? Come on!
Part of me wants to backspace it out like I’ve done on every post I’ve tried to write since the 9th.
Maybe this time I won’t. Maybe ‘poem right this second’ worked. Maybe my writing is unblocked. ❤️ Now that would be something!
Thank for reading.
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