Dear Miracle Mommas

Dear Miracle Mommas,

I know the word miracle in front of mommas is going to throw some of you off, but stick with me for a few minutes and I think you’ll understand.

For the past decade, I have been just this side of Special. The first 3 years were beautiful baby bliss. The next 4 years were test results, IEP meetings, studying Special Education rights, and juggling therapist filled days.

These 3 recent years have been about finding balance, being a voice, and learning to trust my own God-given mother’s intuition.

I am feeling a nudge to write you and tell you that no matter where you are in this journey, that you can absolutely do this. Whether you are a veteran momma 30 years in, somewhere in the middle, or one of the new “1 in 36” mommas, this letter is for you.

Back in the beginning, I identified myself as a special needs mom. But, the more I’ve been in it, the more there’s been a shift. Right now, I see myself in a different sort of role and I’m really at home being a Miracle Momma.

Every kid on this planet is a genuine miracle. Every single one. Do some kiddos have bumps along the way? Maybe. But, those bumps can ultimately make life more endearing and memorable.

I decided not to sit here and fill your time and space with “don’ts.” That sure would be easy to do, but we are each on our own paths.

What I would like to do is share some of the up-sides of this journey. Because, let’s face it, if a kiddo has a medical issue, any sort of delay, or even a learning difficulty, those aren’t generally portrayed as gifts. In fact, the connotation with them can be quite the opposite sometimes.

Looking back to when we got the news of a severe language delay, I wish someone would’ve looked me in the eye and said, “Ahhhh, you can totally do this,” in a super nonchalant, tip their head to the side, while waving their hand, kind of way.

Well, I didn’t know anybody at the time, and that’s ok. I figured things out. What would really be cool is, if something I learned could help you, even the tiniest bit.

Here goes:

  • Be open to the idea that someone, somewhere understands what you’re going through.
  • Be open to the idea that you are enough, exactly the way you are.
  • Be open to the possibility that you may know more about your kiddo than anyone does.
  • Be open to the idea that your intuition is a wonderful guide.
  • Be open to the possibility that even on hard days, the answers can still be found. Keep looking.
  • Be open to the possibility that you may find your authentic, genuine, amazing self at any moment.
  • Be open to the idea that even in those lonely moments, there is a possibility that true friendships will spring forth from unexpected places.
  • Be open to the idea that your child is learning about faith, love, and determination by watching you.
  • Be open to the idea that everything you need is already inside you.
  • Be open to the idea that you are stronger than you think.
  • Be open to the idea that by being your child’s voice, you may find your own.
  • Be open to the absolute 1000% possibility that you will, without a doubt, find your way.
  • Be open to the idea that 10 or 20 years into this, you may be holding out a hand of support to another momma just like you. (That’s a pretty humbling thought, isn’t it?)

I thank you for your time. Thank you for reading this. I’m going to leave you with one final thought. You know that light that shines so bright in your child?

I bet there’s one just like it that shines in you.

Sincerely,

Jessica Adam

Little Bit’s Mom

I love being a mom. I have no idea how I was even able to breathe before this kid was born. We just celebrated our eleventh Christmas and on Christmas Eve, when the house was quiet and I was the only one awake, I found myself getting all sentimental.

We tried to have a baby for what seemed to be forever, though it wasn’t as long as some other couples. I remember the holidays during those five years as mostly heartbreaking. The one thing I wanted more than anything in the world, Santa couldn’t deliver.

When Heaven and earth opened up and I was finally able to stay pregnant, this little miracle made his grand entrance about a month early, putting him here in time for Christmas.

Oh, you don’t even the know the joy I felt, having that little angel in my arms on Christmas that first year.

When I got pregnant, I made a vow to myself not to forget the lonely road we’d traveled. Therefore, I know what a privilege it is to bake Santa cookies, to cuddle up with my beautiful son and watch Santa’s sleigh on the radar, and to read him “Twas the Night Before Christmas.”

Two nights ago, as I stood looking at our beautiful tree during Christmas Eve’s wee hours, a contentment I can barely describe washed over me.

It’s in those moments when grace slides in almost unexpectedly, that I remember just how eternally grateful I am to be Little Bit’s Mom.